Soft People

A topic I've been mulling over for a while is the idea that we as Americans are soft. I can't speak for other countries as I don't have much experience with them, but here in America, we're soft. We spend most of our lives trying to avoid or minimize pain and suffering. On the whole I'm not saying this is bad, but I think we may have gone too far.

Pain is the body's way of telling you something is wrong. Pain is meant to be a good thing. It tells us we're still alive and it's trying to keep us that way. Pain tells you when you've put your hand down on a hot stove, pain tells you when you've miss stepped or stubbed your toe. Pain is a great teacher. But we ignore it.

Take the painkiller commercials for example. Have back pain? Take Tylenol so the pain goes away and you can continue to lift those heavy boxes that are straining your back.
But it's not just physical pain, it's emotional pain too. We avoid real commitment and relationships because we don't want to get hurt. People don't put themselves out there because they don't want to be rejected.

Instead we cocoon ourselves away behind social media and texting. God forbid we actually have to interact with someone face to face. But it's more systemic then that. We don't want to feel even the least bit uncomfortable. We live in climate controlled houses, and go to work at climate controlled buildings in climate controlled cars, lest we ever be cold or hot. Lest we be uncomfortable and maybe even perspire. We don't work out, because we don't want to be sore and we are constantly eating because we never want to feel hungry.

If we do something that's hard, or pushes us beyond our comfort level, we give up, we quit. We are a generation that doesn't know what we are capable of because we are too afraid to try, because it's not comfortable.

I've had the pleasure to facilitate rock climbing outings, and mountain hikes. I'm not talking a short walk in the hills, I'm talking 20 miles in one day with heavy elevation gain. And this is what I see. I see people who get halfway up a rock face and want to quite, because it's too hard, and their muscles have begun to ache. I hear complaints of I can't do it, but you know what I've found? It's a lie. 90% of the time, it's not that they can't, it's that they don't know they can. They've never challenged themselves, they don't know their limits and what they are capable of.

On rare occasions I have seen something else though, I've seen someone achieve far beyond what they thought possible, because they dared to say, No, I don't care what I think I can do, I don't care that it hurts, I will do this. Too often we stop, or give up at the first sign of adversity or pain, when we can accomplish so much more, more then we ever imagine, if we are just willing to push. To go beyond what we think we can do, what we are comfortable with.

It's like building a muscle. You exercise and there is pain, because the muscle is breaking down. But the miracle of the human body is that when it heals, it does so stronger. Pain can be a good thing, it's telling you your pushing your limits. But you don't have to stop. Don't ignore the pain, don't shut it out, or dull it with drugs. Listen to it. Know your body.

There is no growth without pain. Without pain we are lepers, destined to repeat the same mistakes, to continue re-injuring the same wounds, till our fingers fall off.

I would rather push myself, past the pain, to the limit and learn. Learn who I am, and what I'm capable of. We need to stop ignoring or avoiding pain and discomfort, I think it's time we embraced the pain.

Embrace the pain and live a little.